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I saw cover letters with a picture of the coaches family, ones with random quotes on them from Sun Tzu, or JFK, or Mr. One time, I had a coach send me a cover letter about how great of a football coach he was, for a basketball job!(He coached both, but we were hiring a basketball coach.) Many times I’ve had coaches fail to even change the name of who they were sending the resume to.
We just finished with a record of xx-xx, the first time in school history having back to back 20 plus win seasons.(Let me tell you why I will have success at XYZ; one of many examples is that as the Associate Head Coach at XYZ University, I helped to lead our team to their first back to back 20 win seasons in school history!
) Now read what you wrote, and what I wrote – which one is more intriguing?
For instance, when I was at Capo Valley Christian as the AD, I got a cover letter addressed to a school in Texas; I was in California.
I’ve received multiple cover letters from the same coach, but they said different things.
As an Athletic Director, I saw a LOT of different cover letter formats.
A variety of different lengths (keep yours to under a page), different fonts, different colors, on different types of papers, etc.
You have too much extra stuff in my opinion, that doesn’t enhance your letter.
Besides coaching, I also was given the duties of strength and conditioning and individual player development to student-athletes at XYZ College.
You have to leave a little mystery in your cover letter, so they do some more reading on your resume.
The year doesn’t help this story, the location of their school doesn’t help this story, the fact they are the first forein institution, etc.