While you don't want to cater to people's biases, you also don't want to diminish your chances of getting into college.
Carrie, however, isn't one to tone down her identity during the admissions process.
Being Goth isn’t just about physical appearance; it’s a way of life that includes not only individual tastes in music, literature, and popular culture, but also particular beliefs about philosophy, spirituality, and a range of other human issues.
To give just one example, I am planning to major in Environmental Studies, and while it might seem odd to picture a ghoulishly-dressed girl who adores the natural world, it was my Goth outlook that led me to this academic interest.
I read voraciously, and am drawn to subject matter that is somewhat dark; the more I read about humanity’s impact on the planet and the near-apocalyptic dangers posed by global climate change, pollution, overpopulation, the manipulation of the food supply and other environmental threats, the more interested I became, and the more determined that I should become involved.
I, along with other members of my school’s Environmental Club, started a campus recycling program, and lobbied our superintendent to install in all classrooms power strips that are used to easily shut down equipment such as printers and computers at the end of the day, thereby conserving energy and generating significant savings for our school.The essay has a level of maturity and self-confidence that the reader will find attractive.Also, the reader is likely to be impressed by the way that Carrie imagines her audience's reaction.Little phrases like "I don't do sun," and, "a tendency towards sarcasm" capture Carrie's personality in an economical manner that will also get a nice chuckle from her readers.In general, the essay has a great balance of seriousness and playfulness, of quirkiness and intellect.She has clearly encountered prejudice before, and she preempts it when she imagines the admissions folks reading her essay.The current Common Application essay option #1 is a smart choice for Carrie's topic, for the essay certainly is about a central part of her identity.In broader terms, however, all college admissions essays must accomplish a specific task: the admissions folks will be looking not just for good writing skills, but also evidence that the writer has the intellectual curiosity, open-mindedness, and strength of character necessary to be a contributing and successful member of the campus community. Also, the allusion to John Lennon's "Give Peace a Chance" is appropriate given the song's message about acceptance and understanding.It's not a title that is highly original, and it isn't the best hook for grabbing the reader's attention, but it is still a solid title.Carrie clearly shows how she will add an interesting and desirable element to the campus community.The essay demonstrates that she has thought about identity and diversity, that she is open-minded, and that she has a thing or two to teach others about their preconceptions and biases.